The Break, Make and Wake Up

By Olayinka Yusuf Olakangudu 

The term relationship has different definitions but we are going to take one of such definitions as it connects with our discussion. From our perspective, relationship is an emotionally close friendship, especially one connecting a male and a female. It is like an adventure that teaches how to tolerate another person from an entirely different background.

In this regard, relationship itself is a school that your assessment is triggered by your attitudes and tolerance of your partner. This relationship if not well managed, could degenerate to the highest degree of hatred.  A great relationship whether casual or intimate begins with your ability to choose who you want and there after diligently manage the chosen one.

However, in choosing a partner, do we really make the wrong choices? For me it is certainly no. What I think is that a choice becomes the wrong one when the two are unable to blend their differences to perfection. My reason is because, the relationship you suddenly tag a wrong choice actually began on a sweet note. Sometimes we don’t really know what we really desire as lust reigns in our inner man thereby falling into the wrong hands.

Relationship in any capacity is a two-way traffic and should be treated as such. Both parties have a role to play in all ways if it must see the light of the day especially in terms of communication. A relationship with a dictatorial communication style will suffer from degradation. Words can be powerful, but how you say them can even be more powerful and effective. Hence communication should be very dynamic and diplomatic.  

It is never rosy even in the most successful relationships in the world. Every argument is an avenue for you both parties to learn new things about each and become stronger. Jumping out of a relationship because of a crack does not mean you are going to have the next relationship as the best. No one is born perfect that is the more reason every crack should be mended to finally have a perfect relationship. Every relationship must ride on the concept of give and take. You can’t give what you don’t have.

Admitting fault, showing gratitude, apologizing and forgiveness are fundamental keys to a viable relationship. When one party is submissive in times of crises, peace can always be restored but if none is submissive, then doom is at the corner. However, it is also very important not to take the leniency of one party for granted as it could boomerang and lead to what is better imagined.

Patience is the word for a life time relationship because it is the best attribute that can guarantee a success and bring out perfection in imperfection. Most people are in the wrong hands today because they never applied patience in their choices. Some people have toiled with their destined soul mate as a result of impatience for a particular change in their partner. 

No one is born perfect that is the reason why a relationship is not about you per se, it is about us (both parties) bringing out the best out of every bad situation. This is achievable when patience is adopted as a culture in the relationship.